jasper. >> eric: that is it for us for "the five." thank you for watching. ♪ ♪ welcome to "red eye." i'm greg gutfeld or as i am known in finland, ricki lake. filling in to give the pre game report is -- gavin mcguinness' father, jimmy. what is coming up? >> good evening, america. welcome to a wee better -- bit of sanity in a world gone mad. our top story of the night, some poll is proud of the nhs. americans add -- and then evening land volleyball players forced to wear bakinis. and they say, are you serious, by the way?

and our youth don't know how to move out of the house while at the same time saying [ina --] inaudible [. and teachers hospital be in their bloody pajamas. greg? >> jimmy, excited to have you on the show. i hope you do better than your son. >> i love him. are you making fun of my son? >> he had a rough time. >> you [bleep]. >> i had no idea. i apologize. >> apology accepted. >> see new a few minutes. >> love you. >> love you. let's welcome our guest. she is cuter than a care bear strangling a smurf with a hello kitty necklace. look, she can waive, lady. she is so smart rubix cubes

try to do her. and the emergency room has a self-for all of the things huey has fallen on. and it is my repulsive side i can c, bill schulz. and if hilarity was a cross-word puzzle, i would do him in bed. next to me, the great actor and comedian. who cares ? he is the director of "the baby makers." you must see it. and few will cry when he finally dies. good to see you, pinch. >> today's london 2012 section says china took the gold, and the home crowd was stunned when they sliped from silver to bronze. the united states finished with no medal. you can stop training, porch. the gymnasticky are over, and there is no event called long distance falling. there is a hand there and we have lost a mi se. medic. somebody who can blue. >> oh there is somebody wear plying behind me. that's about it.

>> did the tribute make you puke? the opening ceremony was a celebration of all things british and it you cled a salute to the government-run taxpayer taxpayer-run system with children in glowing opt beds that spelled out nhs. some called it left wing propaganda, but the show's director denied any political agendament as the ioc turned piecey, they observed in gymnastics only two members can advance to the all-around. should more -- should more countries have a chance to win? that means jordyn weeker will have to -- wieber will have to sit it out. let's go to the opening ceremony of the we may have a slight satellite delay. mike, are you there?

>> greg, i am here live in london, home of the 2012 olympic. >> what did you think of the opening ceremony, mike? >> greg, i heard it was amazing. a lot of websites and blogs said it was an amazing show. amazing stuff. >> did you not attend? you were supposed to attend this. >> greg, sounds like you dropped out there. can you repeat the question? >> i said i thought you attended the opening ceremony. >> hi, greg. everybody here has olympic fever. i can't wait to report all of the great events to you for the next two months. >> mike, the olympics end in two weeks. what events have you been to so far? >> that's it from london. back to you. >> this is so not working out. welcome to the program. you are a big director.

super troopers, fantastic. >> thank you. >> what did you make of the opening ceremony? what would you have done differently if anything? >> my opinion about the olympics is a little controversial in that i kind of am against televised olympics. and i think they should have their competition, but i am more of a football and baseball fan. i look at the kids in the bed and i am confused. >> it is confusing, isn't it? >> it is not an upbeat, message. maybe to you because you like to hang around hospital beds. >> i didn't see the ceremony, but i will take pay yow tee at a flaming lips concert. there were like sick kids and dancing nhs doctors. i guess i mean it is an easy way for having sick kids and like pro athletes to take care of a lot of make a wishes in

one night. >> i didn't think of that. >> otherwise i think it is creepy and weird. >> it was great though. all of those sick kids were in amazing shape. whatever they had couldn't have been that bad. >> i'm sure you loved this. >> i'm sure when people come home they want their scotch and bourbon, and for me i want to get in my moo-moo and fiddle with my moo-moo and my scotch and look at the olympics and enjoy it. in my mind i was thinking what would the united states equivalence be? postal workers chasing tsa, woulders through a government-paid solar field. and then fan knee and freddy on a fence like humpty dumpty and then they fall down. by the way, where is mary poppins? where was the private sector mary pop tins ? >> wasn't she there? >> yes, mary poppins was there. the only thing missing was a woman named fan knee wearing a moo-moo. >> and smoking a cigar and having a scotch.

>> i don't like to correct nicky, i do, but mash -- make a wish never includes the athletes. >> it it doesn't? >> no, it is not a wide receiver. what are you, a pole vaulter? wearing a leotard? >> you are not asking for a synchronized swimmer. >> nobody is asking for a n athlete that is making less than them. >> i am just glad there was no artistic interpret tigs of their dental system. that is what we should be grateful for. >> was that a fair jab? >> that was a pretty fair jab. >> they were happy with it. they thought it was fantastic. >> they loved it. i actually enjoyed it because i couldn't tell if they were making fun of themselves or they were saluting it. that means they succeeded because they confused the hell out of me. >> free kishly. >> gigantic baby and a nanny on a flying umbrella. you have a meme rum to a heroin addict who killed his girlfriend in the chelsea hotel. >> that was in there too? >> well, they had a sing on

sid vicious. they got a drag queen dressed as a queen who parachuted in. >> i liked that part. >> that wasn't really her though. >> no? well then that wasn't cool. if it was her that would have been awesome. >> i thought george hw was behind her in the plane ready to jump. >> he wouldn't have done it. do you want to talk about the uniforms? do we care? do we have a shot of these dash dash -- okay, these are australian -- i am assuming it is sand. it is sand volleyball. she reminds me of the senile secretary in "splash" that would come in with her bra over her blouse. do you remember that? she had a problem when she came in and every day john candy would see her and she was wearing a bra over her blouse. not the hot part of "splash."

>> i thought she had a bad farmer'ston. >> -- farmer's tan. >> i was drinking soy milk for awhile and discovered it creates man boobs. i called my mother who is a physician and said does soy milk create man boobs? and she said the grass you smoked probably causes more. i look at the uniform and i say, that could probably work. >> it might start a trend among men, but not women. you are right about soy. it is true. that's why you see vegetarians with very big breasts who used to be male. >> all i do is drink soy milk and smoke weed. i feel like i am lactating about it. >> from medals to man babies, they are in between adult and teen. a new survey is examining a new life stage dubbed emerging adulthood between add adolescents and full-fledged adulthood. people aged 18 to 29 -- way to break that.

when you do you feel you have reached adulthood? half said yes and 5% said no and 47% said in someways, yes, in someways no. one said, i am about to be 24 i should feel like an adult, but i don't. my parents support me. another said adults adults are settling on a career and settling down on life. let's look of a tape of a young person trying to make it in today's crazy workforce. >> but at least they tried. she got out of the house, and she knew she was going to fail. she knew she was going to will fa. she knew she was going to get a concussion and wake up god knows where. >> you know what she wasn't doing? mooching off her parents. >> i think her name was kudos.

>> nicky, how much of yourself do you see in the young people polled? >> so much. i lived with my parents until the age of 26 which is embarrassing if you are not asian. it is totally cool in their culture. it means you are moving home to help hot, but if dsh dash to help out, but if you are asian you are helping out. i guess i was shoplifting again and that came back. watch out april better crop be. i found myself attracted to teenage boys again. i still kind of am, but,en yo. you see them and they look better than i remember. i saw this kid the other day and i'm like, good god, where were you when i was a teacher? i could have had you, and now i have nothing. i relate. i really do. >> i moved back home for a year exprkts best thing was getting drunk with your parents. you never could do that. you sit around with your mom and you get wasted. you are going, this isn't so bad. why didn't you let me do this when i was 15. there wouldn't have been so

much conflict. jay, did you see anything remotely that made you feel good? >> i think the problem they are experiencing is they are already on the decline right now. the best time in their life is past. even if they had doubts right now, i can tell you as someone who is now 40, it is all downhill. >> it really is over. what year was it for you? >> it started going downhill at 22. right when i got out of college. it has yet to go back up. >> that's kind of depressing given your profession. >> i am doing well in the movie business of the -- business. it is good, but not as good as it used to be. >> i consider myself a success. now i am bummed out after listening. >> what he is saying is being in high school is better than being a film director. >> film director is hard. >> that's the issue with

college. this study says to me, you should not go to college until are you 30 years old. >> is that what it says? >> yes. if you are a slacking off until 18 to 29, why are you going to blow your parents' money on gender studies? or fake degrees? >> basically say do the reverse. when you get out of school you work until you are 30 and then go to college? >> when do you get wasted? >> that's the important part. >> when do you spend four years getting wasted is what i would like to know? >> i think you have already done that. i think you have put eight years -- >> bill, how do you hope to prey upon these kids? they are emotionally insecure. they are broke. it is a perfect turf for you. >> your answer was in the question. they are emotionally insecure. you don't even need to try. so much better than girls my own age, i assume. i disagree. it is 36. in an article i was 26 and

snuck back into college for two weeks and went to as many classes as i could and stayed in the dorms to see if it was as good as i remembered. i really enjoyed the clauses sms sms -- the classes. this time i engage the teacher. i did my assignments. i did not get a uti my entire freshman year was chugging cranberry juices and hating the unprotected sex gods, but this time i am good. you have to go 26. 18 not so much. >> and you get insurance until 26. >> that's like reading books. all of a sudden you start reading books when you get older. you are waiting to die. >> and sopa watching tv. -- and stop watching tv. >> you watch tv and pretend they are books. if you watch the wire every day that's watching tv. if you watch the whole dvd collection it is like ride reading a book. >> and graphic novels is a fancy way of saying books. from adults to algebra.

should we require what makes you perspire? a writer in the new york times makes a case that algebra shouldn't be taught in high school and college because too many are expected to fail. they say we are misdirecting available resources and making mathematics mandatory prevents us from discovering and developing young talent. he notes that to our nation's shame one in four 9th graders fail to finish high school. three out of four out of dodge figured out how to get ice from the frige. >> that's how bullet gets ice. >> are you sure that is not the kardashians?

>> there could be people in dog costumes. we don't know that. i had no clue. >> you like that? >> no math at school would be good news for girls, wouldn't it? >> oh man. >> but i was not good at algebra. it maybe affected my self-esteem i wasn't good at it, but so did my unibrow or my acne. and yes i think maybe take away the algebra classes and i would have liked a personal finance class. i still don't know what an interest rate is, but i know how to write boobs on the calculater. >> you are prime meat for sub prime 11 deers. >> you know what i wrote down here? i never understood a mortgage until i was 35. >> it is an idiotic op-ed, and they don't want you to make

their own profits which is more from readers than from advertising. they need to be exercised, yes to algebra and yes to calculus and to fid swriks and yes to -- physics and yes to all of the hard scientists. what students are learning is completely not appropriate for what you need to learn and have in the real world. >> what do you think, jay? >> you know, i took algebra and calculus in high school and i got a c plus. when i went to college i had to retake it again. when i got to the class i knew everything. i showed up only once every two weeks for the quiz. and the teacher was a little racist because he assumed i was an meth genius. he would apologize to me saying i am so sorry you have to go through this. i am like, you know, it is all right. and then he -- then one day i was leaving and he goes, i am

going to a meth convention in new york city, and i would like to take you to show you to some other colleagues. i said, you know, i just think of math as something fun and a hobby. i don't want to show off. >> that's a beautiful story. >> he may have missed out on a wonderful weekend in new york. >> last word to you. let's pretend what america cares what you think about this. >> i agree with everything they said. i can manipulate my organ in other ways. i failed algebra, but because i went to the lake force academy, the teacher let me pass anyway because they wanted to get me out of there. i had a horrible gpa. i had to take math again and failed it again in college. some people are notment to do this stuff. i do not remember how to do long division. >> that was quite any pif knee. coming up, i will inspect all of our guests for ticks.

are teachers getting graded on their clothes? the story president obama doesn't want you to see.

they are getting an f on how they dress, and now public schools across the country are cracking down on what teachers wear to class. according to usa today, an actual paper, banned are cutoff shorts, pajama pants and flip-flops. tattoo, jeans, piercings and outlashdish hair styles also as well as tank p to straps -- tank top straps less than two inches wide. schools take action that leads to forced hand amputation. for more let's check in with our youth and education correspondent hungry possum, hp.

>> he can wear cutoffs when ever he wants. what is wrong in this world when a teacher can't wear pajama pants? >> the bigger issue is cutoff shorts. you are talking about kids -- boys in particular who are sort of in their -- you know, they are in their beginnings of their high lotion usage, and it causes trouble. i had a teacher at lake forest academy who was a by yule gee -- biology teachers ander and a french teacher and had all of these fantasies about the two of them having a nice time together. and if they wore revealing outfits on top of that, i think i would have blown a gasket. >> that is good. you don't want to make it any hotter than it really snicky. >> you are staring at me. i'm assuming you are about to say something. >> i was staring at you.

i don't know what teachers are wearing this stuff. they had to make all of these sanctions like you are not old enough to wear a tank top. your straps have to be two inches wide. they won't get reported for that because kids don't know how to measure stuff. >> as we have proven. >> they should be fine. >> liz, should teachers be fired if they don't have enough self-respect to dress properly? >> i don't want to see teachers in cutoff jeans. i'm sorry. >> you are the minority madam. >> what about bras over shorts? >> they should be fired immediately. what was with the australian -- who decided that was a good look for the australian olympic team? >> i like the fact that you are now commenting on that story two stories from now. i did call on you? >> i don't care. i don't care about that. you don't want to see your teacher -- i hate seeing the teacher in a shopping mall or at the beach. that's a weird thing. and so then it is too

intimate. it is like another outer limits episode where you are in another dimension. i don't want to see my teacher looking like that, like my best friend. >> i used to hate to see them at the mall because they were at toys r us and they wouldn't let me leave. they bought me a lot of nice things though. >> really, bill? >> it has a lot to do with an aging populous. you have people in their 40s who have tattoo who are regrettable. >> what does it take to get a tatoo off? >> that's the industry of the future. >> going to resorts now and you can see all of the people your age that the tattoo don't look right on cellulite. it is disgusting. and the gauged earrings, that's what you should get into if you are a doctor, reconstruction of the ears. sthaz -- that's going to be a big business. >> or create an island. that's my solution for everything. we have to take a break.

do you have a comment on the show in e-mail as you at red eye at fox news.com. 212-462-5050. still to come, the half time report from jimmy mcguinness. ♪

welcome back. let's see if we have anything wrong so far. let's go to jimmy mcguinness. hi, jimmy. >> are you all right, pal some. >> i'm great, thank you. >> i have a million things to say. how much time do i have? a fair amount of time? >> yes, a fair amount of time. feel free to start when ever

you want. >> all right. now? >> yes. >> right now? >> yes, you can start right now. >> all right. first note, jay, what is going on with your teeth, by the way? they are blinding like some of the neon check lights. are those your real teeth? >> yes. i think i just have contrast. >> where i am from i don't have fluoride in the water. it is like neon. it is like these lights in the studio, but in your mouth. let's start this, seriously. you are talking about the opening for the olympics. who in this panel actually saw it? please put up your hand. one, two -- what is going on with [inaudible]. >> i saw pictures and read captions of what happened.

same difference. >> no! it is not the same bloody thing! >> i would like to apologize to our blind viewers. how dare you. >> who are you? you are a deaf person doing bloody record reviews. and nicky, you haven't seen it? >> what did you say? >> you didn't see it. >> no. >> but have you your two cents all the same. >> yes. >> that is ridiculous. >> not everybody has the time. >> why is that ridiculous? she is allowed to have an opinion. and why do you get to say who has an opinion? this lovey lady can say what ever she wants. she is very smart. just because you are wearing a red pom-pom on your head -- >> i don't think you saw it. you are talking about mary poppins. >> you are polish. >> that was a joke, you silly [bleep].

>> did you see opening ceremony talking about mary pop tins? poppins? she was there. >> yes, i was ignoring her. i got up to get a pretzel because i couldn't take it. >> you were commenting on something you didn't see. >> no, i did see it. >> so you did see mary poppins? mary poppins was there. >> when you are in my neck of the woods you get mary poppins and i don't. i don't get mary poppins flying through the air. you can have your olive green plaid and your -- >> we are moving on. she was there and you didn't see her. you don't talk about something you didn't see. >> i went to get a presents swrel. >> next, bough bikini. jay, do you smoke marijuana? >> yes. >> you inhale marijuana cigarettes at this time, at this age? >> i sure do. >> you do big bong hits with a big bong and you suck it out

there? >> do that again? >> you are making that clear. let's get that on the record. you hear that? so you said during the striping segment that striping is better than mooching. >> yes. >> so you support striping? you would rather a woman bare her breast to strangers than stay at home and try to make a name for herself? >> sometimes i don't have income so i have to take what my daughters give me. >> have you ever stripped? >> oh, have i ever stripped? >> aye. >> no, i -- no i take a shower with my bathing suit on. >> would you strip? would you take off your clothes and reveal that tiny glow worm that you've got amongst your pubes. >> i don't like that you, a, made fun of my size, and, b,

assume that it glows. >> see you at the power plant. here is another thing talking about degrees, let's get in the panel, how many people here have actually graduated from college? all right. jay, what is your degree? >> i am a history -- i was a history major. >> history major. has that helped you in your job? >> it is about telling stories and i tell stories, yes. >> so when you have these stories about history, you are being told a story, and that helps you tell stories? >> yes. >> stretch. so what was your degree? >> me? >> aye. >> i can't even understand bill. it is unbelieve believe a. my degree was mass communications prey journalism. i mu this whole magazine thing is a splash in the pan. >> did you pay for that, or

was that your parents? >> no, i pied -- i paid for it. >> how much was that? >> i learned about mutual funds and worked as a secretary. >> how much was the total bill? >> oh, gosh, it must have been over -- it was like 28. >> 28 was the bill for bill. and what did you take? >> english. >> english? and did that help you? >> yes because this clearly -- clearly this train of thought is making everybody stop what i am looking at here. >> and you are last. what did you take? >> english. >> did that help you? >> yes. i am fluent. >> and that leaves us at old grege boy. >> yes. >> what did you take, wee man? >> english. >> english, and did that help you? >> not at all. >> that didn't help you? >> no memory of it whatsoever. >> it didn't help you at "maxim" when you were fired for being a [bleep]

>> i missed that. >> it didn't help you at "maxim" when you got fired for being a [bleep] >> i guess i didn't need to ask you to repeat that. >> it is interesting that college did help everyone on the panel, by the way. that is something else. >> are we getting somewhere with that? >> it did help me i will admit it. >> have i no faith in college, but i have faith in mathematics. algebra does matter. you can't be a political public dit and not know the basics of math. how many immigrants come through a day -- bill, how many illegal immigrants come through the border every day? >> carry the one, add the two, i'm going to say 42.3. >> no, 10,000. >> susan is not a number. >> that's the problem. are you both talking about mathematics and say it is good for self-esteem and it is good

for exercise and it is good for data. you need it for actual, applicable things. it is not gymnastics. you need mathematics for actual things. it is not just exercising your brain. she said it is good to exercise -- she said -- >> it is good for everyday life in the reeled world and not gender-based studies in college. clearly this is a polluted stream of consciousness that has run its course somewhere. >> did you not say that it is a good exercise? >> i said the brain is an organ and it needs to be exercised, but you need to have math in the real world is what i said. >> don't they contridict each other? >> no. >> let's focus on the latter. it is not important to exercise your brain per say. it is important to use it in they real world. >> you know what i am starting to think? i am thinking grounds keeper willy over here is hearing what he wants to hear. he is putting mall formed

words in his mouth. >> that was painful, bill. that was quite painful. >> sorry. >> you know what? i am done with this. i am done with you. i don't need to listen to this crap. you are all done. >> you didn't even get to the end of the story. you didn't even get to the end of the story yet. >> what story some. >> didn't we have one more story? >> i forgot something about you saying that was two stories ago and the teachers and their bloody pj's. i'm done. i don't need that. >> we have a story about teachers. you are not going to do that? >> all right, i will. do you find the general mentality with the american dress has gotten ridiculous? for example, i like to throw this to nicky, when you are at the airport and somebody is wearing their pj's and

sleeping at the terminal, are things not getting out of hand with cash you wall tee? >> are you describing me at the airport. >> you wear pj's? >> i look rough. it is gross. >> that is despicable. what do you wear when you go on a plane? >> i like to dress casual like you said. >> do you wear pj's? >> no. i dress in a dress. >> you wear flip-flops ? >> no. >> you don't wear flip-flops on a plane? >> no. >> thank god. jay -- do jay. do you at least wear your shoes on the plane? i know you have the bob dylan shirt and the jeans, but do you wear your bloody shoes on the plane? >> i wear a slip oslip off sandal actually. >> that is not acceptable. we are calling that off. that is starting the nerve. >> how are you going to ban that? >> i have a thing with obama.

you and him are tight? >> i i am not getting into it. i cannot say a thing about it. believe you me, pal, no one will have nonshoes on the plane and then the next seven days, watch it happen. >> all right. i guess that's enough. >> peace out. >> peace out. very urban. >> so how does one host the fox business show after consuming three pot brown knees? elizabeth mcdonald discusses her new book buy low and sell super high. when we return, what is a man aisle, and why is bill shopping there? we report and you stloa up. you throw up.

should your local shopping zone have more testosterone? this tha was actually a good rhyme, bill. >> thank you.

>> they have launched the first man aisle. ie, an area of the store where a dude can grab all of his guy-centered groceries. this is like a franklin and bass episode, and then get the heck out. broheims don't have time to browse, ladies. it is condoms and steak sauce and beer and wheaties with nary a scented candle to be found. we decided to send our most womanly host over to send more. sadly he lived. >> thanks, greg. i am at the west side market. it is the only market in this area or any area with a man aisle. let's go in and get our bro on. hi, how are you? don't like me? okay. >> guys, how did this come about? >> well, we read a story in espn about an increase in men shopping for families. george and i went up to the office and said what can we do to cater to these guys coming to the store. >> this is important.

we have entrepreneurs that watch the show. if you can't read, learn how to. that's important. literacy is a huge problem in the united states. >> that's funny i majored in that. >> in read ?g wheaties not only the brrrr brrrr eke fast -- not only the breakfast of champions. and they have joe lewis. >> that's mohamed ali. a man's man. >> i call him cashes clay. for the sensitive viewers, you can too. is this for food or a lubricant? >> what do you use it for? >> lubricant. there is pleasure in pain. what manly thing will you get here? >> maybe hot sauce. >> here is what i am dying for, dandruff shampoo, and i will tell you why. it is alaska in my hair right now. i am assuming it is dandruff. some crawl. i am assuming this head and shoulders will help me. 24 is a sensitive topic, but whey wee have to address it.

what if a woman looks at this aisle? grab a product and i will act as a freelance security guy here. you can pay me, if you want. grab something. block and p oi nt. here is the good news, she and people who look like her will never come back. you are welcome. which of these things would you like to buy in a perfect world. >> if i was in real need i would come to the man aisle to get a protein bar. >> i actually own a saloon in greenwich village called the protein bar. also not woman friendly. i feel like we could make it manly yes, sir. >> what would you add? >> beanie babies. here is the thing about beanie babies. this is a sea, cow, it is awesome. i know you have seen "eyes wide shut." guys have sex parties and a hooker gets out of line and you have to kill her.

the entire time you have masks. let me try this. remove your clothes. >> this is the unsung hero and the front man taboo. here is the thing about taboo. he wrote a book. it is called keep it so the positive. what do most of us do? we fall down. what did taboo do? >> fall up? >> thank you. and in the end that's how i kept it on the positive. word. they didn't like my products and they didn't like my had whys. you know what i like? the man aisle. back to you, greg. >> so, okay. th is an amazing achievement. they just took crap and put it in one aisle and threw in a sign and got national news. >> national news and a couple other markets. they have man aisles there. you had eyes.

that was not an aisle. >> it was like the size of this table. >> it was little thing in the corner with some dorritos. but the publicity is inavailable. it is a lesson. >> somebody else will steel that idea. trump will have a man aisle tomorrow, and it will be incredibly perverted the things. it will be european models. >> we should start a man isle, i-s-l-e, a dude only area. shirts optional and fun guaranteed. joy nothing but hetero fun. just because we are guys we don't have to be modest. >> let's get our tan on. >> we are confident in our hetero-sexuality. >> it is called broing out. there are a lot of men burning. >> that's true. we have to take a break. up next we talk to jay about his new movie "the baby

makers."

it has been called the citizen cane. it is "the babe makers." it is about a guy who talks his friends into stealing the deposit he left at a sperm bank. you can catch it at select

theaters or on itunes. the director and star in the film is here to discuss it. is this the same group, the broken lizard group? >> it is two of us. it is me and the guy who played farva, and then olivia munn is in it and -- >> guys go like this. and wood harris from "the wire." >> i like him. i was wondering what happened to everybody in "the wire." and this guy paul schneider. >> got him. >> now is avon -- i just assume he is like avon, but is he? >> i was a little scared at first, but he is cool. he is funny. >> we have had a lot of those guys here. omar was on "red eye" wearing an ankle bracelet because he was arrested. that's awesome. enough about him. is this based on a true

story? >> the writer had trouble getting his wife pregnant and awhile ago donated sperm, so, yes. >> i like that. that's a dumb question based on a true story. i don't even know why that is there. >> i don't believe there was a sperm bank heist, but, you know. >> give me the plot. it is a romantic comedy that turns into a heist movie. >> the couple is trying to have a baby and the guy's sperm is no good because of tess -- testicular trauma. but he used to donate to a sperm bank when he needed money for his wife's ring. he tries to get back the sample. they have one left who sold it to another couple and they like him and they want their kid to be like him. and he and his pals put together a team and stage a sperm bank heist. some people who have seen it have called it "oceans 11" with sperm. >> so i wasn't off baseballs i happen to think "oceans 11"

may be better than" citizen cane." this may be the most time we said the word sperm. it beats last friday. >> what were you thinking? >> untalented accuse stick singers. it opens this friday and you have to check it out if you are flans of "super p truers,"" club dread" they are all crazy movies.

it is time for the post game wrap up. hi, jimmy. >> guys, keep it short. i hear you are doing stand up this week, jay. give us the details, please. >> i am at the ballroom august 1st at 9:00 p.m. >> all right. too long. >> have i a show at joe's pub

on thursday and i will be at the comedy cellar all weekend or all next week. follow on twitter and insta gram. >> way too long. i hear you are hosting this week. >> yes, every night at 8:00 opposite bill o'reilly. if you gett tired of bill o'reilly come on over. >> back to you, grege. >> jimmy, can i see your back tatoo? >> there is nothing under here. it is like a bloody sauna. >> show your back tatoo. that's beautiful. >> my son has the same one. >> go back to him. you don't need to look at me. >> ♪ scotland ♪ when we will see